ADD Free Write

I'm reading the Sharpie package..."permanent on most surfaces"....what does most entail? Wood, definitely. Paper, yes for sure. Foreheads, that's a big HELL YEAH. What surface would not hold a Sharpie mark? What surface would dare outright reject such a branding? What kind of person thinks about this?

Me, that's who. I just finished one of my classes and the boomrang insomnia is kicking back full force. It comes and goes, and with it, comes ADD. Jason loves when Insomniac Jack is in town. She is full of spontaneity, new ideas and analysis paralysis. What I mean by that is beginning to analyze something and mid-thought, having nothing else to think about the subject. My brain literally stops. Deer in headlights, I'm almost sure to do it in public and draw all attention where I love it to be, on me (insert high pitched laughter as I slowly back away and run). Soon after comes the nervous laughter as I realize someone is staring at me, so I pull out a cell phone and pretend the phone is ringing, only to have it ring for real during a fake conversation. It's like walking one direction and needing to turn around mid-pace, hoping to God no one is looking so you can gracefully about face without looking like a complete tool.

I did that once. In the mall last year. I was trying to find my friend who was meeting me near the movies, only instead of calling or texting her, I decided to turn around and check to see if she was by the main entrance. As I'm turning around, I see out of the corner of my eye teenages (are they allowed out that late? Wait, it's only 7pm) and I almost trample them as I gracefully change course. I then do what I can only think to do which is fake wave. That's right, I fake waved to a fake friend. So I wouldn't be that person that someone was people watching and just randomly changed direction. I had to create public purpose. As I'm waving to my fake friend, someone actually waves at me and I have to pretend I'm waving past them, you know, to make them feel awkward. We've all been there. Are they waving at me? Should I be the rude one and pretend I don't know them? Yes, clearly the best option is to keep walking.

Like when someone is talking on their bluetooth, only you don't know they are. You're walking face to face in a hallway and all of a sudden you hear the hey how are ya. Heart stops, do I know this person? Keep walking, reply, keep walking, reply....oooh oooh I know this one. Reply. Ehhhh wrong answer. Dirty looks thrown your way. How dare I butt in on their conversation.

America is so rude and condescending.